Sunday, February 20, 2011

The Swallow

More of my writing. I've acquired a serious case of writer's block lately.
        
           I have decided to only love strangers. This method will allow me to elude the suffering that derives from intimacy. There will be no attachment required. I will never even know of my lover’s name. Nor will I become accustomed to the sound of their voice (I may never even hear it), or the curve of their back, or their idiosyncratic mannerisms. Instead, these people will merely be my muses that inspire poetry. They will pass by me, blissfully unaware of my infatuated gaze and bubbling affection. Perhaps they will read my work, but never will they know that it was written for them. 
            A girl sits across from me in the bus. She has a pearly complexion, eyes as blue and as wide as a porcelain dolls, and blonde ringlets. Never will I caress her cheek or trace my fingers across her protruding vertebrae. I will never have the opportunity to breathe in the aroma of her skin while I tenderly kiss her swan neck. Does she have a family? A brother? A sister? Why do I care, I will never meet them even if she did. 
My theory sounds absurd and terribly lonely to any sensible man or woman. However, I am not without reason. My tribulations and doleful existence has rendered me unable to experience intimate love for a person who I hold close to my heart. In fact, I am convinced I posses no heart. Between my rib cages, there is only a empty chasm of nothingness. This void is a vacuum inside of my body. My lungs are black, my cheeks are yellow and sallow, and my figure is cadaverous. As my body continues to deteriorate, I cease to exist.
  I do not love you anymore. I never did love you. How can I love when there is no heart beneath my breast?


flores de pequeña jaula
love notes

27 comments:

Vanessa said...

interesting and lovely, do write more! stuff like this makes me happy, and i realise there are many, many more dreamy people in the world besides myself. it's that feeling of knowing you're not alone, as alone as you may be. i suppose that's the beauty in writing. :)

Binny said...

This is one of the most beautiful things I've read lately. Thank you.

ching said...

your writing is so genuine. strangers are the most interesting kind of people..and are friends we haven't met yet.

Kat said...

i always feel like leaping off mountains after reading your riding.

it's a good thing.

Kat said...

*writing. confound typos.

Haylee said...

You call that writers block? You've got to be kidding me.. that's like better than my writing at it's best!
About FIDM, how cool you're planning on going there! My friends at the LA campus right now. I'd love to go there but I don't think I'd get in so I'm not going to apply. ha or at least not this year.
I agree with this post by the way. I love meeting and talking to strangers. (Perhaps that's why I like blogging so much?)

Caroline Ergy Erg said...

That writing is stunning, you're ever so talented! What pretty photos as well! Your blog is just so lovely.
xxxxxxxxxxx

Emily said...

I really like your writing. Peoples minds really do work like that!

Also- are these photos yours? They are gorgeous!


~Emily
http://travelandtoile.blogspot.com

mckenzie. said...

The way this is written... so beautifully evocative. I love it.x

ANTONIA said...

so beautiful :)

Paislea Elyse said...

i love your writing. it makes me smile. you have a gorgeous style.

allister bee blog

StickyKitten said...

I love the way you pair photography with words. You do have a pretty writing style, sad as it is :( I wish you were happier though. xo

Pervesely Perfect said...

Such a lovely piece of writing. I love the picture that says 'you make my bones quiver sir'. Great post

Emma//

Sue Lyn said...

something about the simplicity of pictures that make them so intriguing. <3

freyja said...

aaaamazing pictures :D

www.theprfectplayground.blogspot.com

MLMB said...

This is beautifully written. Your blogs are so moving and amazing. Wonderfully creative. Love love love :) ƸӜƷ MLMBeautiful ƸӜƷ xxx

ADELE said...

I think this writing is beautiful ! I don't speak english fluently, but I managed to understand, I love it. And the photos are great too !

ADELE said...

I think this writing is beautiful ! I don't speak english fluently, but I managed to understand, I love it. And the photos are great too !

My Republic of Fashion said...

Fantastic writing! Gorgeous pictures. :)SArahD

ANTONIA said...

so, i love the place where you live ;)
u know, i'm going to californa in january :)

Intrinsic Fulfillment said...

Cassidy - I just discovered your blog - and this is one of the most beautiful pieces of writing I've ever read.

I hear you want to be a writer, I definitely think you should pursue that.

I dedicated this post to you: http://intrinsicfulfillment.blogspot.com/2011/02/its-not-question-of-whether-to-love-its.html

Thank you so much.

Monica said...

Your writing is lovely, and all of these photgraphs are beautiful.

M.

Anonymous said...

Cassidy,

When in your life have you ever taken a bus ride?

Elise McCreary said...

these photos are gorgeous, i love the ones in the hot tub! following now! follow back?

thestylevoyager said...

Wonderful photos! It's very romantic, a bit dark, simply gorgeous!

The Stylish Nomad said...

Very cool photos!

xx
Kaylee

sarah said...

i love these photos
so pretty