Speaking A Dead Language

I apologize for leaving some of you hanging with 2nd to latest post. I stated I was writing a book and didn't say anything more. Well, as promised, this is a little excerpt from it:

"I became so easy to go days without food. It was a struggle at first, I would constantly give up half way through the day and binge when I got home from school only to be consumed in my guilt and vomit it all up. I remember sitting in my last period class arguing with myself over if I was going to binge or not when I got home. My anorexia always resisted the idea, insulting my will-power and volleying me with degrading comments about my body and character. She always told me if I gave into food, I would be dishonoring my commitment to her and proving my weakness. Resistance was strength. Being able to resist the temptation of eating, in my mind, made me strong. At my lowest weight, I would flaunt my ability to defy food’s tantalizing presence. My warped reality lead me to think that people found this skill admiral and incredible. I would purposely buy clothes that would bring attention to my emaciated body..."

It's about my expierence with my eating disorder, as one can probably tell. I have no intention of getting it published (although my family and therapist strongly urge me to). It's more for myself and of course for others who are struggling as well. My insight is a gift and I feel the desire to share it so others can relate and possibly be inspired.

"From an outside perspective, I was spiraling downwards faster and faster every time I skipped a meal or vomited. But I only saw improvement in my character."